Give Chance a Chance: Waiting on pins and needles...

Good evening, readers.

The last 36 hours have included enough stress to add a few pimples to the face and a handful of premature gray hairs to my head. I apologize for not updating more frequently. While in Auburn, I only had access to my phone. Although it's a snazzy "space phone" (iPhone), it still refused to be compatible with my blogging needs. Rude.

So, let's get to updates.

The initial x-rays were inconclusive. (Let's all roll our eyes at the same time. Ready? Go.) We were hoping to see a definitive beginning and ending point to the tumor, so we could put him directly into surgery the next day (12/28/11) with a solid plan of action. We're unable to see anything definite in the x-ray. This most likely means one of two things. I'll give you the worst of the options first, just the make the second option (which otherwise wouldn't be considered "great news") give you about 13% more of a "Yippee!" feeling.

A. The reason we can't see the beginning and ending point of the tumor is because it has spread throughout the entire left side of the jaw bone. If this is the case, the cancer is inoperable. This option sucks. I have written a letter to management to request a different option. I will advise on their response. I'd rather not discuss this option further, because once the tears start, I can't find the "off" valve.

B. Although the surgeons are leaning more toward the horrible, ridiculous, sucky option A... there is a slight chance (<--- Chance!!!) that the tumor is localized to a few teeth and the gum line. This would explain why we are unable to clearly notice it in the bone on the x-ray.

The only way to figure out how far the cancer has spread and where it is currently living in my horse's mouth (COMPLETELY uninvited. Rude!) is to do a CT scan. The first availability for this is tomorrow morning at 0800. We should receive the results back tomorrow to know what the next step is.

Yes. I did try to bribe them for an earlier appointment. I offered a large rainbow lollipop (thanks, Carolyn), a romance novel, and peanut butter chocolate wafer snacks. None of these worked. Worth a try...

So, to answer your next question: What happens once we get the results?

If we are officially presented with option B... the amazing surgeons at Auburn, Dr. Waguespack (Say that 3 times fast) and Dr. Yorke, will go in from the side of his face and remove the tumor, the teeth it's affecting, the gum, and part of the jaw bone. Their goal would be to get "clean margins." This simply means they want to cut and cut until there are ONLY cancer free cells remaining. This is still a very invasive surgery, but it is unfortunately the best possible scenario.

If there were an option C, it would consist of something along the following lines: the cancer has spread to MOST of the mandible. Surgery would consist of removing as much of the affected portion of the mandible as possible and replacing the area with pins (in and outside of the face. He'd look like the Terminator horse.) and would follow with extensive, uncomfortable, painful, and not 100% successful radiation treatment for nearly a month. In any other instance where this surgery was done on a horse, the tumor grew back and took the horse's life within 3-12 months. I will not put Chance through this, as his quality of life would be poor... and painful. He deserves neither.

Bottom line, this sucks. For me, yea. However, I'm mostly heart broken for Chance. He's an innocent creature with a giant heart and has helped me through the hardest times in my life. I planned to include him in therapy for children as he aged a bit more... and I even have gotten recommendations for him to be a police horse. He's so versatile. He's so well rounded. He's not just some animal. He's got a pure soul and only wants to give people smiles and laughs. And yes, he has accomplished that COUNTLESS times within his 19 years of life... but it isn't enough. He deserves at least another decade of farting on people when they brush his tail (it means love) and nodding his head when asked questions, along with his other quirks and jokes.

When I created the name of this blog, the first thing to come to mind was "Give Chance a chance"... because that's what he deserves. He's given SO much in his life. He's given his shoulder for me to cry on. He's given his muzzle for smooches. He's given his slobber to mess up my business clothes (out of pure love, obviously). He's gone for runs with me in the pasture without telling me how fat my butt looks. He's been the cheese to my macaroni. The superglue of my life.

The donations slowly trickle in. I'm appreciative for each. Believe it or not, the LARGE number of small monetary donations has added up to MORE than the few larger monetary values. So when I say that every small amount helps, I for reals mean it.

So here's what you need to do. You need to pray to whatever god you believe in. You need to write Santa a letter and ask for a belated (or early?) Christmas present. And you need to donate. Don't put this to the back of your mind. Don't be like, "Oh... I'm sure she's getting plenty of donations. She'll be fine." We don't have enough to cover the surgery yet. We're getting closer... but we're not quite there.

Don't hesitate. Don't think anymore about it. Follow your heart. Please help me save my animal.

Attached are some pictures we took today while at Auburn.

Thank you for staying tuned... and thank you in advance for your donation.

How Chance feels about your donations.